According to our textbook, gender is not innate nor necessarily stable. It is defined by society and is learned. Gender can change over time. We are born male or female, but we learn to act in masculine and/or feminine ways. Often times, our gender is influenced by our parents and peers.
Growing up in a 'religious' household, made me aware from a young age, of my gender. The church I grew up in always made it very clear the distinction between boys and girls and what was expected of them. The religion has some standards, one of them being girls wear only skirts. It is a sign of modesty and femininity. My earliest memory of an interaction with my parents that communicated expectations of being a girl, was when I was five, I wanted to wear a pair of pants but was told 'girls wear skirts, not pants'. I know some people may look at this and think to themselves, how awful. Although as an adult I have strayed from that religion, I am thankful for what it instilled in me. I love being a girl, I love being feminine and wearing skirts. I know wearing skirts doesn't make me a woman, but I love how I feel when I do wear them.
The most recent interaction I can think of that communicated expectations for my gender was in class just the other day. We were doing class introductions, and one of the questions we were prompted to answer was, what is a stereotype that people assume by just looking at you. A male classmate said his would be that people think hes mad when hes really just tired. He said it in a comical way explaining that his girlfriend is especially the one who thinks hes angry when hes just tired and it always starts a fight. Another student (a female) asked him why he doesn't just tell her hes tired, instead of letting it turn into an argument. He then said, you know how girls are, then they'll ask why you're tired and the conversation will just keep going and going, a few other guys in the class agreed and the girls just laughed. Again, it was said in a humorous way so in no way was it offending but it also showed how guys look at girls. What I thought when he said that was, how very true. I'm a girl, and I know I do the same thing with my boyfriend. The whole interaction was light and fun but it did point out expectations of being a female.
